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Antiques
The Chuckle Brothers talk about the care and preservation of antiques. Plot Paul is waiting in the studio when Barry comes in and tells Paul that a man with a van is unloading a pile of old junk and Paul tells him they are valuable antiques and that is what the program is about. Paul introduces the program and it being about Antiques. He tells Barry to go and collect the old junk from the back door which Barry corrects them being Antiques. They then go out and about to see what is worth collecting. Barry arrives at the shop and finds a statue that has been placed on top of a washing machine and he puts it next to it's twin, but leaves the card. But when Paul comes in he mistakes it for being 400 years old and swears it looks new. Paul then walks off and Barry puts the card back next to the statue. They then go outside and Paul is carrying a metal detector looking for Roman Coins like the ones he gives to Barry to keep safe, but as they go around the tree Barry drops them and Paul thinks he has discovered some more and gets excited and then they both realise they are the same coins and hand back to the studio. Paul moves onto the paintings and they examine The Mona Lisa, he then gets Barry to carry a box of antiques in and he drops and smashes a vase and starts to panic. Paul is about to hand over to armchair theatre when Barry asks him where he wants the vase and he asks about the matching one and he admits that he broke it, he then tells Barry to stick it back together and then turns back to the audience and hands over to armchair theatre. Barry is then seen sticking the vase back together and tears a piece of paper out of a booklet to wipe his hands on and Paul comes in to check on him and is looking for his booklet so Barry replaces the page with a blank piece of paper. Paul tells the audience about restoring oil paintings and that they will be cleaning The Mona Lisa with the aid of the pamphlet. Barry gets to clean the paintings and starts to follow Paul's instructions but he starts at the top of the picture instead of the bottom and ruins it, when he returns to the picture the frame is blank. He then puts a frame in front of it and Paul comes to ask him what he is doing and tells him to remove them, when he does, the picture has been replaced by one Barry has painted and it looks like a 2-year old has done it. Paul then hands over to Art Expert Simon Lovell. Paul moves onto Fossils and Barry brings in a giant bone, but Barry doesn't believe it is off a Tyrannosaurus Rex. Barry then brings in the broken vase and puts it on the shelf, but he can't move back because his hand is stuck to it and Paul tells him to stand there and look Decorative. Paul tells the audience that the vases are a great example of Mingdinsity China. Paul moves onto checking how old they are by looking on the bottom but that isn't very successful but Paul decides to ping it instead, but when pinging it with his knuckle doesn't work very well, Barry hands him a hammer and he smashes the vase. Paul looks at the audience that by the sound of it that it wasn't very good quality and he announces the end of the show and says goodbye, before arguing with Barry about why he handed him the Hammer. Quotes "To start with, you need a special cleaning solution called X24-73P, and some light cleaning material" "Are we going to clean the lights as well then?" "It looks like a two year old's done it!!" "Well it was one of his early works!" Watch the episode below! Category:Episodes Category:Series 1 Category:Episodes Written By John Sayle Category:Episodes with Guest Appearances